MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
Going to read @CKlosterman's new book #Visible Man today in a day. Waiting for @magersandquinn to open at 10. Will live tweet w/ pg. #s.
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
And, yes, I will spoiler alert everything. I know you're all waiting to read it yourselves.
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
Leaving the house to pick up coffee (prepared), coffee (unprepared) and #VisibleMan.
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 1 I'm starting the novel with no previous notions of what it is about other than it's a @CKlosterman book.
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 2 Fiction v. Non-fiction. Veracity. Truth?
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 5 Unreliable narrator?
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 9 Has anyone tried e-mailing thevickster@gmail.com? Trying. Didn't immed. bounce back.
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 13 George Harrison "Be Here Now" youtube.com/watch?v=He2yrz…
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 20 "his pseudologia fantastica [footnote: This is more commonly referred to a pathological lying.]"
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 21 Book misuses Heisenberg Uncertainty in the usual way. Can't know bc of a mechanical reason, not theoretical.
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 22 Guilt vs sensation of guilt. Objective vs. subjective.
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert This book so far prompted me to look up and listen to The Jayhawks' "Blue" online.
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 31 "Tall people are naturally confident. History has proven this- Alexander, Wilt Chamberlain, Gisele."
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 46 Not trusting that the type of people who read his books would also be able to hang w/ theoretical ideas?
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 57 Ha! Ha, ha, ha. Small admission; I'd totally do that.
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 59 Another small admission; I do that too.
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 62 I've actually watched that Yao Ming documentary and have a hilarious & heart-touching story about it.
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 83 "He wasn't there, and then he wasn't there."
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 87 Now the book can start for real. Everything before this has been pretext, scene-setting. Now comes the book.
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 88 The narrative seems H.G. Wells until I thought about it. Its actually Henry James "Turn Of The Screw"-esque.
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 92 I find the word "she-wolf" funny.
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 100 Had an experience like this recently w/ my GF. Well, all the details are different. But it's close feeling.
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 101 Daniel Johnston - The Beatles youtube.com/watch?v=YbBXkF…
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 103 "agency"
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 105 en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mary_Deck…
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 105 Also, Mary Decker iconicphotos.files.wordpress.com/2009/09/davidb…
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 114 I wonder what McLuhan would think of "The process was always the problem."
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 121 en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tarahumara
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 146 Only kind of aware of what's going on. But this feels like the peak of the book coming up.
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 131 "It's like trying to using math to figure out history." I wonder what Bill James would think of that.
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 147 A little "There Will Be Blood" love has me turning on the soundtrack.
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 134 Made me think of edped.tumblr.com/post/753554181…
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#NowPlaying There Will Be Blood – Prospectors Arrive open.spotify.com/track/5gHu56UX…
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 160 "agency"
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 161 Jooky MaGoo is a real band. myspace.com/pistolwhipoffi…
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 167 Oh, hell no.
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 169 Reading this book thinking of WIM's book "Faking It". Chuck and I must read the same books. #humblebrag
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 179 This is like the personal propaganda from "I heart Huckabees".
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 191 I could've thought this up vs. I did think this new
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 203 Recondite is the perfect word there. merriam-webster.com/dictionary/rec…
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 224 The temptation must've been to leave things vague. To never resolve it. But this is fiction.
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 230 Finished. I liked it a lot. Looking at the book as a whole, it feels like a book about US involvement in...
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 230 ...torture and rendition. Reading too much into it? Yes, probably. But it feels like it.
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
#VisibleMan #spoileralert pg 230 Also, 1st thing I learned on 1st day of college in Shakespeare class: Appearances can be deceiving.
4 Oct
MichaelRHerman Michael R Herman
An excellent book. Feel like I'll be thinking of it for a while. #VisibleMan
4 Oct
CKlosterman Chuck Klosterman
@MichaelRHerman Thanks, man. Really glad you liked the book & did this experiment. It was extremely, extremely flattering.
4 Oct
Sunday, October 16, 2011
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Game Over (Welcome To The Future)
I was talking with some co-workers today about the AL Central and one of my friends was adamant that the Cleveland Indians weren't going to win the division. I think that's nuts.
Going back to 2006, an outlier season where three teams in the Central finished with 90 wins or better, this is how many wins the 2nd place team in the AL Central had at the end of the season:
2010 - 88 wins by the Chicago White Sox
2009 - 86 wins by the Detroit Tigers (Minnesota Twins won a 1 game playoff)
2008 - 88 wins by the Minnesota Twins (Chicago White Sox won a 1 game playoff)
2007 - 88 wins by the Detroit Tigers
The winner of the AL Central has needed to win an average of 88.5 games to take home the pennant. Let's call 89 wins the magic number to win the AL Central. The first team past the 89-win post is going to win the AL Central except by fluke.
After 40 games the Indians have banked 26 wins and to get to 89 wins they need 63 wins over their last 122 games. That's only two games above .500 and the Indians are currently playing at a pace 12! games above .500 for the season. They could lose their next ten games and go one for two the rest of the way and still hit 89 wins.
I think the AL Central is over. The Indians would need to collapse in epic fashion and someone else would have to raise their game incredibly to catch them. And that's a problem going forward because this team is built to win for the next handful of years.
Going back to 2006, an outlier season where three teams in the Central finished with 90 wins or better, this is how many wins the 2nd place team in the AL Central had at the end of the season:
2010 - 88 wins by the Chicago White Sox
2009 - 86 wins by the Detroit Tigers (Minnesota Twins won a 1 game playoff)
2008 - 88 wins by the Minnesota Twins (Chicago White Sox won a 1 game playoff)
2007 - 88 wins by the Detroit Tigers
The winner of the AL Central has needed to win an average of 88.5 games to take home the pennant. Let's call 89 wins the magic number to win the AL Central. The first team past the 89-win post is going to win the AL Central except by fluke.
After 40 games the Indians have banked 26 wins and to get to 89 wins they need 63 wins over their last 122 games. That's only two games above .500 and the Indians are currently playing at a pace 12! games above .500 for the season. They could lose their next ten games and go one for two the rest of the way and still hit 89 wins.
I think the AL Central is over. The Indians would need to collapse in epic fashion and someone else would have to raise their game incredibly to catch them. And that's a problem going forward because this team is built to win for the next handful of years.
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Crazy Like A Fox
The phone rings in the Utah Jazz draft war room. GM Kevin O'Conner answers. It's Minnesota Timberwolves GM David Kahn on the other end.
"Kevin, this is David. I wanted to wish you good luck with the draft tonite."
"Thank you, David. The same to you."
"I also called to talk shop. Any interest in trading the #2 pick for Derrick Favors?"
"I'll be honest, David. I haven't warmed on Williams. We'll pass."
"Okay, Kevin. I just thought I'd call and make sure."
On the TV in the background, David Stern approaches the podium. He announces the Cleveland Cavaliers select Kyrie Irving from Duke University. The phone rings again.
"Hello."
"Kevin, it's David again. We're taking Jimmer..."
"That will be a bold pick, David."
"...at eleven."
"What?"
"Derrick Favors."
As O'Conner listens to the dial tone, the TV the clock clicks down to zero.
"Kevin," says a Jazz employee. "We're on the clock."
Still stunned O'Conner says, "Um, Derrick Williams. And call everyone between us and twelve. See who they want for their pick."
On the television David Stern announces that with the second pick in the NBA Draft the Utah Jazz select Derrick Williams of the University of Arizona. The analysts go insane. Bill Simmons makes his first "Kahhhhhnnnn" tweet.
"Kevin, it looks like the Wolves have called around and noone was able to make a deal with them. They can't believe this is happening either."
A progressively frustrated looking David Stern announces the Cavaliers selection of Enes Kanter, Toronto's selection of Jonas Valanciunas and Washington's selection of Bismack Biyombo with the third, fourth and fifth picks in the draft.
"What are we hearing?" says O'Conner to noone in particular.
"Nothing. Everyone is thrilled to be getting their guy. We got some offers to take Jimmer and trade him to us. None of them are worth mentioning. Mostly the same offers we got before tonite."
Stern announces Sacramento picks Brandon Knight and the commisioner drops his scowl long enough to smile for a picture. Jay Bilas announces there is a rumor the Utah Jazz are calling around the league trying to trade up for Jimmer. The Pistons select Jan Vesely with the seventh pick and the phone rings.
"Kahn," O'Conner says as he lifts the receiver to his mouth.
"Kevin, do we have a deal?"
"You can go to hell."
O'Conner slams the phone back onto the cradle. A Jazz employee turns to him.
"Charlotte will take him for us but they want us to take back Jackson for Kirelenko. The Wolves apparently told them about the Jimmer situation."
"Tell them no."
Two minutes later a visibly upset Stern wipes froth from his mouth as he emerges from the green room and announces the Bobcats select Kemba Walker. The phone rings again.
"Ignore it," says O'Conner. "Let him ruin his team."
The room sits in silence as the phone rings and rings.
"Milwaukee will take him for us but, thanks to the Wolves, we have to take Maggette."
"No."
Stern announces the Bucks take Tristan Thompson. Almost immediately Stern reemerges from behind the curtain. He smiles widely.
"With the 10th pick in the NBA Draft, the Minnesota Timberwolves select Jimmer Fredette from Brigham Young University."
The next day Fredette is met by a throng of press. He poses with his new jersey as his new GM looks on and he smiles at his new teammate Michael Beasley. Then he sits and leans forward to the microphone.
"The first thing I want to say," he says as he flashes a smile, "is how happy I am to be the newest member of the Oklahoma City Thunder."
Later that same day Russell Westbrook is introduced as the newest member of the Minnesota Timberwolves. Kevin Love beams as his best friend and college roommate gives a good interview and says the right things.
The Timberwolves make the playoffs the next year with a 27-23 record and fail to make it out of the first round. The team stays together for the length of Love & Westbrook's extensions and fluctuates between the late lottery and first round exits. When they leave, the team restarts with a player who is something like 12 years old now.
"Kevin, this is David. I wanted to wish you good luck with the draft tonite."
"Thank you, David. The same to you."
"I also called to talk shop. Any interest in trading the #2 pick for Derrick Favors?"
"I'll be honest, David. I haven't warmed on Williams. We'll pass."
"Okay, Kevin. I just thought I'd call and make sure."
On the TV in the background, David Stern approaches the podium. He announces the Cleveland Cavaliers select Kyrie Irving from Duke University. The phone rings again.
"Hello."
"Kevin, it's David again. We're taking Jimmer..."
"That will be a bold pick, David."
"...at eleven."
"What?"
"Derrick Favors."
As O'Conner listens to the dial tone, the TV the clock clicks down to zero.
"Kevin," says a Jazz employee. "We're on the clock."
Still stunned O'Conner says, "Um, Derrick Williams. And call everyone between us and twelve. See who they want for their pick."
On the television David Stern announces that with the second pick in the NBA Draft the Utah Jazz select Derrick Williams of the University of Arizona. The analysts go insane. Bill Simmons makes his first "Kahhhhhnnnn" tweet.
"Kevin, it looks like the Wolves have called around and noone was able to make a deal with them. They can't believe this is happening either."
A progressively frustrated looking David Stern announces the Cavaliers selection of Enes Kanter, Toronto's selection of Jonas Valanciunas and Washington's selection of Bismack Biyombo with the third, fourth and fifth picks in the draft.
"What are we hearing?" says O'Conner to noone in particular.
"Nothing. Everyone is thrilled to be getting their guy. We got some offers to take Jimmer and trade him to us. None of them are worth mentioning. Mostly the same offers we got before tonite."
Stern announces Sacramento picks Brandon Knight and the commisioner drops his scowl long enough to smile for a picture. Jay Bilas announces there is a rumor the Utah Jazz are calling around the league trying to trade up for Jimmer. The Pistons select Jan Vesely with the seventh pick and the phone rings.
"Kahn," O'Conner says as he lifts the receiver to his mouth.
"Kevin, do we have a deal?"
"You can go to hell."
O'Conner slams the phone back onto the cradle. A Jazz employee turns to him.
"Charlotte will take him for us but they want us to take back Jackson for Kirelenko. The Wolves apparently told them about the Jimmer situation."
"Tell them no."
Two minutes later a visibly upset Stern wipes froth from his mouth as he emerges from the green room and announces the Bobcats select Kemba Walker. The phone rings again.
"Ignore it," says O'Conner. "Let him ruin his team."
The room sits in silence as the phone rings and rings.
"Milwaukee will take him for us but, thanks to the Wolves, we have to take Maggette."
"No."
Stern announces the Bucks take Tristan Thompson. Almost immediately Stern reemerges from behind the curtain. He smiles widely.
"With the 10th pick in the NBA Draft, the Minnesota Timberwolves select Jimmer Fredette from Brigham Young University."
The next day Fredette is met by a throng of press. He poses with his new jersey as his new GM looks on and he smiles at his new teammate Michael Beasley. Then he sits and leans forward to the microphone.
"The first thing I want to say," he says as he flashes a smile, "is how happy I am to be the newest member of the Oklahoma City Thunder."
Later that same day Russell Westbrook is introduced as the newest member of the Minnesota Timberwolves. Kevin Love beams as his best friend and college roommate gives a good interview and says the right things.
The Timberwolves make the playoffs the next year with a 27-23 record and fail to make it out of the first round. The team stays together for the length of Love & Westbrook's extensions and fluctuates between the late lottery and first round exits. When they leave, the team restarts with a player who is something like 12 years old now.
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
30 Days of Music in 1 Post
Over on the venerable Book of Faces I participated in the 30 Day Song Challenge. Every day for a full month you post a song following a certain rule for the day. It's fun to do and it has spurred a little discussion if not as much as I'd hoped for initially.
The only thing I'd improve is it seems aimed at a younger set of followers. Some of the rules are a little focused on teenage angst and less on showing your appreciation for music. So, as a brain exercise, I'm going to redo the 30 Day Song Challenge as tho I were writing it and aiming it at my peer group.
Day 1 - Your favorite song - "A Whiter Shade of Pale" by Procul Harum
This one is the same as the actual challenge and it doesn't change.
Day 2 - Your favorite song from the last year - "Runaway" by Kanye West
In my opinion, the 3 best songs from the last 12 mos. were "Bed Intruder", "Fuck You" and this song. Out of those 3, this is the one I still listen to frequently.
Day 3 - Your favorite song which is 50 years old this year - "My Favorite Things" by John Coltrane
This takes us back to 1961 which was a weird year in music. Rock had struck it big in the middle of the previous decade but had cooled for various reasons. So we're still 3 years away from The Beatles coming to America and jazz is making its last run on the top. As such, I pick Coltrane at or near his peak.
Day 4 - Your favorite song which is 25 years old this year - "Diamonds on the Soles of Her Shoes" by Paul Simon
This jump takes us back to 1986 which was the first year I really started to listen to music and have my own opinions on it, simple tho they may be. One of the albums I remember my dad (and, by proxy, me) listening to a lot was "Graceland" and I've held a special affinity for the album even until today. In fact, if you pulled up my fandom of Vampire Weekend you'd find "Graceland" at its roots.
Day 5 - Your favorite song which is 10 years old this year - "Jo Jo's Jacket" by Stephen Malkmus
Now we're up to 2001 and in that year I would've told you my favorite album that year was Weezer's green album. But now it's been 10 years and there are two albums I'd go to the shelf and pull out to listen to on a whim: The (international) Noise Conspiracy "New Morning, Changing Weather" and Steve Malkmus' first solo album. Since I like the latter better than the former, I'll put that one out front.
Day 6 - A Song Which Was Played At The 1st Concert You Ever Attended - "Hanging Tough" by New Kids On The Block
Fuck yeah I went to a New Kids concert and I was excited as shit to go. It was 1989, the concert was at the Met Center and my young ears and heart were won by whatever was on WLOL. My whole family went, we sat right were the speakers were pointed and I still have vivid memories of it. Some might find it embarrassing to admit their first concert was the New Kids. I think it's kind of perfect.
Day 7 - A Song Played At The Most Recent Concert You Attended - "I'll Buy" by The Replacements
It's been the slow season for concerts here in Minnesota and I've been kind of skint here at the end of it all as bands start touring thru here again. Consulting my calendar tells me the last concert I went to was the Replacements tribute at First Ave over the Thanksgiving weekend. Yes, it's been that long. Either way, here's the original version of a song from "Tim".
Day 8 - A Song Played At The Best Concert You Ever Attended - "Warning" by Green Day
Another shocker perhaps. The best concert I ever went to was in January 2001 when Green Day played The Eagles Ballroom in Milwaukee. My friends Adam, Bryan and I drove down from school in Green Bay and it was an amazing show. The band was in the in-between space after their "Dookie" success but before their "American Idiot" success. This meant they were actually trying and tuned in and it made for a great show.
Day 9 - 4 Days of Songs About Classical Elements: Air - "Blowing In The Wind" by Bob Dylan
I could go with Bob Dylan for each of these. But I'll limit myself to this one as the quintessential song about wind. And since YouTube only has covers, it should be one by someone who at least knows Dylan.
Day 10 - 4 Days of Songs About Classical Elements: Earth - "Dead Leaves & The Dirty Ground" by The White Stripes
Again, you could probably go with Jack White on each of these. But again I'll limit myself.
Day 11 - 4 Days of Songs About Classical Elements: Fire - "Fire" by Jimi Hendrix
When you think of fire you should think of Prometheus and Jimi Hendrix.
Day 12 - 4 Days of Songs About Classical Elements: Water - "Take Me To The River" by The Talking Heads
There are a lot of great songs about rain, oceans, snow and tears. But this one is the best one about rivers.
Day 13 - A Song about Luck - "Lucky" by Radiohead
This is the first song I ever heard off "OK Computer". This performance actually since I was a Launch subscriber.
Day 14 - A Song About Love - "Lovesong" by The Cure
This song came out when I was about 9 or 10 and it was the first time I remembered a love song sounding sad. Not just "Baby, baby. Where did our love go?" but actually sad while still being about love.
Day 15 - A Song About Falling Out of Love - "Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow?" by Amy Winehouse
The original is a little too upbeat. I like Winehouse's cover better.
Day 16 - A Song About Loneliness - "So Far Away" by Carole King
How did anyone survive the 1970s? Seriously, did everyone just zone out and let shit happen? Or did everyone break their hearts early on and what we have now is the broken version of those people?
Day 17 - A Song About Happiness - "You Are The Sunshine Of My Life" by Stevie Wonder
Scratch that. Everyone in the 1970s must've been listening to Stevie Wonder. Boom! Happiness achieved.
Day 18 - A Song About The Past - "In My Life" by The Beatles
This song, in addition to being my father's favorite Beatles song, was the music which scored Kevin Arnold's first kiss with Winnie Cooper on "The Wonder Years" and you can't get any more about the past than that.
Day 19 - A Song About The Present - "Right Now" by Van Halen
CARPE DIEM, MOTHERFUCKER!!! (Drink Crystal Pepsi.)
Day 20 - A Song About The Future - "Ooh Child" by The 5 Stairstep
Yeah, I see myself as an optimist. But if my fault is believing better things are around the corner, it's a fault I'm okay having.
Day 21 - The Original Song Sampled in A Hip-Hop Song - "One Step Ahead" by Aretha Franklin
To be later used by Ayotollah on Mos Def's "Ms. Fat Booty". When you hear it, you'll shit bricks.
Day 22 - A Song Which Should Be Sampled By A Hip-Hop Song - "Billie Jean" by Michael Jackson
It used to be "Cruel Summer" by Bananarama. Now I just wish someone would use "Billie Jean", especially the drum beat and bass lines which are both dope as hell.
Day 23 - Coolest Guitar Riff - "Seventeen Years" by Ratatat
I know it's kind of unfair to put Ratatat here because all they do is riff. But it's my rules and I choose how to enforce them.
Day 24 - Coolest Guitar Solo - "Dazed and Confused" by Led Zepplin
Listen, I could've put everything Jimi Hendrix or Eddie Van Halen ever did in this slot. But I chose Jimmy Page playing "Dazed & Confused" in "Song Remains The Same". Get it?
Day 25 - Coolest Vocal Solo - "Great Gig In the Sky" by Pink Floyd
One of the few times I can think of where the human voice was used as an instrument and yet also given it's own space. If this had been a guitar or a saxophone, it would've been cheesy. But the human voice...
Day 26 - Best Verse - "6 Foot 7 Foot" by Lil Wayne
Yeah, just pick your favorite between either of Wayne's verses on this song. Both are classics.
Day 27 - Best Chorus - "Enjoy The Silence" by Depeche Mode
Just read the words.
All I ever wanted/All I ever needed/Is here in my arms/Words are very unnecessary/They can only do harm
God, there's just so much there.
Day 28 - Best Cover - "Hurt" by Johnny Cash
This is the one time on this list I feel like if I'd forgotten about this song for this category I actually might've hated myself. Like actually been angry with myself.
Day 29 - Best Mashup - "I'm A Flirt 7/4 Shoreline" by The Hood Internet
I could've gone with a Girl Talk or Super Mash Bros mashup here. The Hood Internet is on to something here and it's sneaky good.
Day 30 - Last Song You Heard Before Starting This List - "Vanessa From Queens" by Stephen Malkmus
From the very good and under radar "Pig Lib" album, Malkmus woos a reluctant paramour.
The only thing I'd improve is it seems aimed at a younger set of followers. Some of the rules are a little focused on teenage angst and less on showing your appreciation for music. So, as a brain exercise, I'm going to redo the 30 Day Song Challenge as tho I were writing it and aiming it at my peer group.
Day 1 - Your favorite song - "A Whiter Shade of Pale" by Procul Harum
This one is the same as the actual challenge and it doesn't change.
Day 2 - Your favorite song from the last year - "Runaway" by Kanye West
In my opinion, the 3 best songs from the last 12 mos. were "Bed Intruder", "Fuck You" and this song. Out of those 3, this is the one I still listen to frequently.
Day 3 - Your favorite song which is 50 years old this year - "My Favorite Things" by John Coltrane
This takes us back to 1961 which was a weird year in music. Rock had struck it big in the middle of the previous decade but had cooled for various reasons. So we're still 3 years away from The Beatles coming to America and jazz is making its last run on the top. As such, I pick Coltrane at or near his peak.
Day 4 - Your favorite song which is 25 years old this year - "Diamonds on the Soles of Her Shoes" by Paul Simon
This jump takes us back to 1986 which was the first year I really started to listen to music and have my own opinions on it, simple tho they may be. One of the albums I remember my dad (and, by proxy, me) listening to a lot was "Graceland" and I've held a special affinity for the album even until today. In fact, if you pulled up my fandom of Vampire Weekend you'd find "Graceland" at its roots.
Day 5 - Your favorite song which is 10 years old this year - "Jo Jo's Jacket" by Stephen Malkmus
Now we're up to 2001 and in that year I would've told you my favorite album that year was Weezer's green album. But now it's been 10 years and there are two albums I'd go to the shelf and pull out to listen to on a whim: The (international) Noise Conspiracy "New Morning, Changing Weather" and Steve Malkmus' first solo album. Since I like the latter better than the former, I'll put that one out front.
Day 6 - A Song Which Was Played At The 1st Concert You Ever Attended - "Hanging Tough" by New Kids On The Block
Fuck yeah I went to a New Kids concert and I was excited as shit to go. It was 1989, the concert was at the Met Center and my young ears and heart were won by whatever was on WLOL. My whole family went, we sat right were the speakers were pointed and I still have vivid memories of it. Some might find it embarrassing to admit their first concert was the New Kids. I think it's kind of perfect.
Day 7 - A Song Played At The Most Recent Concert You Attended - "I'll Buy" by The Replacements
It's been the slow season for concerts here in Minnesota and I've been kind of skint here at the end of it all as bands start touring thru here again. Consulting my calendar tells me the last concert I went to was the Replacements tribute at First Ave over the Thanksgiving weekend. Yes, it's been that long. Either way, here's the original version of a song from "Tim".
Day 8 - A Song Played At The Best Concert You Ever Attended - "Warning" by Green Day
Another shocker perhaps. The best concert I ever went to was in January 2001 when Green Day played The Eagles Ballroom in Milwaukee. My friends Adam, Bryan and I drove down from school in Green Bay and it was an amazing show. The band was in the in-between space after their "Dookie" success but before their "American Idiot" success. This meant they were actually trying and tuned in and it made for a great show.
Day 9 - 4 Days of Songs About Classical Elements: Air - "Blowing In The Wind" by Bob Dylan
I could go with Bob Dylan for each of these. But I'll limit myself to this one as the quintessential song about wind. And since YouTube only has covers, it should be one by someone who at least knows Dylan.
Day 10 - 4 Days of Songs About Classical Elements: Earth - "Dead Leaves & The Dirty Ground" by The White Stripes
Again, you could probably go with Jack White on each of these. But again I'll limit myself.
Day 11 - 4 Days of Songs About Classical Elements: Fire - "Fire" by Jimi Hendrix
When you think of fire you should think of Prometheus and Jimi Hendrix.
Day 12 - 4 Days of Songs About Classical Elements: Water - "Take Me To The River" by The Talking Heads
There are a lot of great songs about rain, oceans, snow and tears. But this one is the best one about rivers.
Day 13 - A Song about Luck - "Lucky" by Radiohead
This is the first song I ever heard off "OK Computer". This performance actually since I was a Launch subscriber.
Day 14 - A Song About Love - "Lovesong" by The Cure
This song came out when I was about 9 or 10 and it was the first time I remembered a love song sounding sad. Not just "Baby, baby. Where did our love go?" but actually sad while still being about love.
Day 15 - A Song About Falling Out of Love - "Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow?" by Amy Winehouse
The original is a little too upbeat. I like Winehouse's cover better.
Day 16 - A Song About Loneliness - "So Far Away" by Carole King
How did anyone survive the 1970s? Seriously, did everyone just zone out and let shit happen? Or did everyone break their hearts early on and what we have now is the broken version of those people?
Day 17 - A Song About Happiness - "You Are The Sunshine Of My Life" by Stevie Wonder
Scratch that. Everyone in the 1970s must've been listening to Stevie Wonder. Boom! Happiness achieved.
Day 18 - A Song About The Past - "In My Life" by The Beatles
This song, in addition to being my father's favorite Beatles song, was the music which scored Kevin Arnold's first kiss with Winnie Cooper on "The Wonder Years" and you can't get any more about the past than that.
Day 19 - A Song About The Present - "Right Now" by Van Halen
CARPE DIEM, MOTHERFUCKER!!! (Drink Crystal Pepsi.)
Day 20 - A Song About The Future - "Ooh Child" by The 5 Stairstep
Yeah, I see myself as an optimist. But if my fault is believing better things are around the corner, it's a fault I'm okay having.
Day 21 - The Original Song Sampled in A Hip-Hop Song - "One Step Ahead" by Aretha Franklin
To be later used by Ayotollah on Mos Def's "Ms. Fat Booty". When you hear it, you'll shit bricks.
Day 22 - A Song Which Should Be Sampled By A Hip-Hop Song - "Billie Jean" by Michael Jackson
It used to be "Cruel Summer" by Bananarama. Now I just wish someone would use "Billie Jean", especially the drum beat and bass lines which are both dope as hell.
Day 23 - Coolest Guitar Riff - "Seventeen Years" by Ratatat
I know it's kind of unfair to put Ratatat here because all they do is riff. But it's my rules and I choose how to enforce them.
Day 24 - Coolest Guitar Solo - "Dazed and Confused" by Led Zepplin
Listen, I could've put everything Jimi Hendrix or Eddie Van Halen ever did in this slot. But I chose Jimmy Page playing "Dazed & Confused" in "Song Remains The Same". Get it?
Day 25 - Coolest Vocal Solo - "Great Gig In the Sky" by Pink Floyd
One of the few times I can think of where the human voice was used as an instrument and yet also given it's own space. If this had been a guitar or a saxophone, it would've been cheesy. But the human voice...
Day 26 - Best Verse - "6 Foot 7 Foot" by Lil Wayne
Yeah, just pick your favorite between either of Wayne's verses on this song. Both are classics.
Day 27 - Best Chorus - "Enjoy The Silence" by Depeche Mode
Just read the words.
All I ever wanted/All I ever needed/Is here in my arms/Words are very unnecessary/They can only do harm
God, there's just so much there.
Day 28 - Best Cover - "Hurt" by Johnny Cash
This is the one time on this list I feel like if I'd forgotten about this song for this category I actually might've hated myself. Like actually been angry with myself.
Day 29 - Best Mashup - "I'm A Flirt 7/4 Shoreline" by The Hood Internet
I could've gone with a Girl Talk or Super Mash Bros mashup here. The Hood Internet is on to something here and it's sneaky good.
Day 30 - Last Song You Heard Before Starting This List - "Vanessa From Queens" by Stephen Malkmus
From the very good and under radar "Pig Lib" album, Malkmus woos a reluctant paramour.
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Why I'm White
I finished Christian Lander's new book "Whiter Shade of Pale" A few months ago now and it's taken me a while to write about this a wonderful skewering of elitist liberal culture. An expansion and update of his super-successful Stuff White People Like blog and ensuing book deal, Whiter Shade of Pale takes us across the United States and into the womb-like pockets of true White America.
The amazing part about Stuff White People Like is it is the rare instance of the subject also being the target audience. Those amongst the right and the uncool aren't privy to what makes White America ridiculous so their criticisms lack wit. It is the type of comedy which doesn't come from Us vs. Them but Us vs. Us. As such you laugh at the same time as thinking "Am I really like that?"
Reasons I Am A White Person
1.) My family is Republican and I'm not.
But by "my family" I mean anyone I'm related to over the age of 50. Basically if you are from the generation ahead of mine in my family, they did a really good job providing for their children thru determination and hard work. Now that they've paid for my entire college tuition (all 5 years), I'd appreciate if they'd give back all of the money they earned. Not because they've stopped working hard. Just because I saw the enormous positive influence that money had on my life and can't imagine anyone else would have to go without those advantages either. The irony is fighting to keep it for themselves in the name of dedication and hard work is the same thing as fighting to eventually give most of it to me, someone who didn't earn it. So I'm going to be the unwitting benefactor of a system tipped in my favor while the future George Washington Carvers & Jonas Salks will have to deal with shoddy science books. Meanwhile the future Howard Zinn will just shake his head.
2.) I don't follow ANY religion.
Don't let my grandmother read this. But the last time I went to church when it wasn't a wedding, ordination or funeral was 2005. Not a big deal, you say? The Church isn't for everyone? More spiritual than religious? Yeah, I'm not into that either. Here's a quick rundown of my "religious" beliefs; If you're going to follow a system of values professed by a human, they should be the ones which focus on humanity. Any mythology not relating to life as we know it is irrelevant. I get that it was metaphorical and meant for a less-educated audience. I'm a more-educated audience and for me the holy trinity begins with Freud, Nietzsche & Marx. Our worldly problems have real-world causes and we have the very real capability and responsibility to fix them. Leave the ghosts to Hamlet. Or, even better, leave them to Scooby Doo.
3.) I like a lot of things that are listed in the book.
Including the first book, I'm guilty of liking the following:
Coffee, Barack Obama, Wes Anderson Movies, Having Black Friends, International Travel, David Sedaris, Not Having A TV, Wrigley Field, Architecture, Brunch, Arrested Development, Netflix, Indie Music, Sushi, Plays, Liberal Arts Degrees, Irony, Dogs, Documentaries, Japan, Bicycles, Knowing What's Best For Poor People, Recycling, Standing Still At Concerts, Michel Gondry, Mos Def, Difficult Breakups, Threatening to Move to Canada, The Idea of Soccer, Hating Corporations, T-shirts, Shorts, Having Gay Friends, St. Patrick's Day, San Francisco, Music Piracy, New Balance Shoes, Beards, Noam Chomsky, Self-Deprecating Humor, Integrity, The Criterion Collection, High School English Teachers, Free Health Care, Che Guevarra, Non-American News Sources, Subtitles, The ACLU, Platonic Friendships, Dave Chappelle, Nintendo Wii, The Simpsons, Avoiding Confrontation, Books, Music Festivals, Glasses, McSweeney's, Hardwood Floors, Bakeries, Modern Art Museums, Cheese, Self-Importance, Conan O'Brien, British Slang, Anthony Bourdain, Nannies, Messenger Bags, Punk Rock, Promising To Learn A New Language, The World Cup, Self-Aware Hip-Hop References, Trivia, Whole Wheat, Ugly Sweater Parties, Monty Python, The Onion, Short Stories, Alternative Newspapers, Losing Weight, Trader Joe's, Supporting The Troops But Not The War, Bob Marley, Road Trips, Girls With Bangs, Swimming, Google, Hummus, Olives, Facebook, Cult Movies, The Big Liebowski, Peacoats, Vice Magazine's Dos and Don'ts, Punctuality, Waiting In Line, Taking A Year Off, The Winter Olympics, The Office, Banksy and Being Offended.
Mea Culpa
And in the face of such glaring evidence I have to plea guilty because the truest mark of a White Person is the hypocrisy of believing you aren't when you very clearly are. One of my heroes is George Carlin and one of his funniest stories is of the night he heard a couple talking in the front row of his show. The husband was upset by one of Carlin's jokes and Carlin overheard the wife say to the husband, "It's okay, honey. He isn't talking about us." I laugh at Stuff White People Like because I get to laugh at an unobstructed view of myself.
The amazing part about Stuff White People Like is it is the rare instance of the subject also being the target audience. Those amongst the right and the uncool aren't privy to what makes White America ridiculous so their criticisms lack wit. It is the type of comedy which doesn't come from Us vs. Them but Us vs. Us. As such you laugh at the same time as thinking "Am I really like that?"
Reasons I Am A White Person
1.) My family is Republican and I'm not.
But by "my family" I mean anyone I'm related to over the age of 50. Basically if you are from the generation ahead of mine in my family, they did a really good job providing for their children thru determination and hard work. Now that they've paid for my entire college tuition (all 5 years), I'd appreciate if they'd give back all of the money they earned. Not because they've stopped working hard. Just because I saw the enormous positive influence that money had on my life and can't imagine anyone else would have to go without those advantages either. The irony is fighting to keep it for themselves in the name of dedication and hard work is the same thing as fighting to eventually give most of it to me, someone who didn't earn it. So I'm going to be the unwitting benefactor of a system tipped in my favor while the future George Washington Carvers & Jonas Salks will have to deal with shoddy science books. Meanwhile the future Howard Zinn will just shake his head.
2.) I don't follow ANY religion.
Don't let my grandmother read this. But the last time I went to church when it wasn't a wedding, ordination or funeral was 2005. Not a big deal, you say? The Church isn't for everyone? More spiritual than religious? Yeah, I'm not into that either. Here's a quick rundown of my "religious" beliefs; If you're going to follow a system of values professed by a human, they should be the ones which focus on humanity. Any mythology not relating to life as we know it is irrelevant. I get that it was metaphorical and meant for a less-educated audience. I'm a more-educated audience and for me the holy trinity begins with Freud, Nietzsche & Marx. Our worldly problems have real-world causes and we have the very real capability and responsibility to fix them. Leave the ghosts to Hamlet. Or, even better, leave them to Scooby Doo.
3.) I like a lot of things that are listed in the book.
Including the first book, I'm guilty of liking the following:
Coffee, Barack Obama, Wes Anderson Movies, Having Black Friends, International Travel, David Sedaris, Not Having A TV, Wrigley Field, Architecture, Brunch, Arrested Development, Netflix, Indie Music, Sushi, Plays, Liberal Arts Degrees, Irony, Dogs, Documentaries, Japan, Bicycles, Knowing What's Best For Poor People, Recycling, Standing Still At Concerts, Michel Gondry, Mos Def, Difficult Breakups, Threatening to Move to Canada, The Idea of Soccer, Hating Corporations, T-shirts, Shorts, Having Gay Friends, St. Patrick's Day, San Francisco, Music Piracy, New Balance Shoes, Beards, Noam Chomsky, Self-Deprecating Humor, Integrity, The Criterion Collection, High School English Teachers, Free Health Care, Che Guevarra, Non-American News Sources, Subtitles, The ACLU, Platonic Friendships, Dave Chappelle, Nintendo Wii, The Simpsons, Avoiding Confrontation, Books, Music Festivals, Glasses, McSweeney's, Hardwood Floors, Bakeries, Modern Art Museums, Cheese, Self-Importance, Conan O'Brien, British Slang, Anthony Bourdain, Nannies, Messenger Bags, Punk Rock, Promising To Learn A New Language, The World Cup, Self-Aware Hip-Hop References, Trivia, Whole Wheat, Ugly Sweater Parties, Monty Python, The Onion, Short Stories, Alternative Newspapers, Losing Weight, Trader Joe's, Supporting The Troops But Not The War, Bob Marley, Road Trips, Girls With Bangs, Swimming, Google, Hummus, Olives, Facebook, Cult Movies, The Big Liebowski, Peacoats, Vice Magazine's Dos and Don'ts, Punctuality, Waiting In Line, Taking A Year Off, The Winter Olympics, The Office, Banksy and Being Offended.
Mea Culpa
And in the face of such glaring evidence I have to plea guilty because the truest mark of a White Person is the hypocrisy of believing you aren't when you very clearly are. One of my heroes is George Carlin and one of his funniest stories is of the night he heard a couple talking in the front row of his show. The husband was upset by one of Carlin's jokes and Carlin overheard the wife say to the husband, "It's okay, honey. He isn't talking about us." I laugh at Stuff White People Like because I get to laugh at an unobstructed view of myself.
Monday, April 11, 2011
To JB, Who Would Be Reading This
Earlier this year my friend JB passed away after a courageous battle with cancer. I saw him for the last time when he asked everyone come to see him on a Sunday nite. He was just home from surgery and said he wanted to keep everyone up to date. When I saw him, he looked sick. But he had just been in surgery and I figured I would see him again soon when he was feeling better, probably sometime after my birthday. My birthday was on a Tuesday about a week later and he died that Thursday.
The very last thing JB and I talked about was this blog. I felt very discouraged about a lack of readers and he assured me that he was reading and that I should continue writing. Well, he passed away so I haven't really felt like writing anything here. Instead I'm just going to share an e-mail exchange JB and I had last year which I love and will remain my favorite memory of my friend.
August 3, 2010 - From: JB Becker
a dream
Michael,
I had this really shitty dream when I almost killed you. It took place in the house I grew up in and in my dream I was like a serial killer or something. You were for some reason in the bathroom with my sister Julie and for some reason I violently attacked you.
You ended up being OK at the end of the dream (just had like a concussion) but it was weird and unsettling, so, I am just trying to discharge the freakishness of it by telling you about it.
I promise never to attack you in real life.
Best wishes,
JB
August 4, 2010 - From: Michael Herman
JB,
My only comment is this. I have a friend who is so kind and gentle-hearted that ALMOST murdering me in a DREAM is overwhelming upsetting. I am lucky to have such a good friend.
Mike
August 5, 2010 - From: JB Becker
Thank you Mr. Herman. You know just how to put a friend at ease.
The very last thing JB and I talked about was this blog. I felt very discouraged about a lack of readers and he assured me that he was reading and that I should continue writing. Well, he passed away so I haven't really felt like writing anything here. Instead I'm just going to share an e-mail exchange JB and I had last year which I love and will remain my favorite memory of my friend.
August 3, 2010 - From: JB Becker
a dream
Michael,
I had this really shitty dream when I almost killed you. It took place in the house I grew up in and in my dream I was like a serial killer or something. You were for some reason in the bathroom with my sister Julie and for some reason I violently attacked you.
You ended up being OK at the end of the dream (just had like a concussion) but it was weird and unsettling, so, I am just trying to discharge the freakishness of it by telling you about it.
I promise never to attack you in real life.
Best wishes,
JB
August 4, 2010 - From: Michael Herman
JB,
My only comment is this. I have a friend who is so kind and gentle-hearted that ALMOST murdering me in a DREAM is overwhelming upsetting. I am lucky to have such a good friend.
Mike
August 5, 2010 - From: JB Becker
Thank you Mr. Herman. You know just how to put a friend at ease.
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
What I'm Talking About When I'm Talking About Dreaming
When you're little you have big plans. They are plans which come with being young, having your whole life in front of you and more or less not knowing better. Since these are usually longshots that noone can or will tell you aren't likely to happen, they get grouped together as your dreams. While an actual dream may have you flying or speaking in front of your whole school while naked, these are things that under the right circumstances could possibly happen. Anyone who has ever achieved them has begun with the dream of one day doing them. In that regard, you've completed the first step.
Then life catches up with you. Things aren't as easy as they seem and that person who achieved the dream you're aspiring to... well, they're the one who did it. There were other people who also wanted to do the same thing, who dreamed the dream just like them, who never got there. You don't hear their stories because there's no way you could document them all. They are swept away by the rushing horde who follows the one person who did achieve their dream. When Eminem says "You can do anything you set your mind, man," at the end of Lose Yourself, he's speaking from his own experience. He just omits that he was a remarkably talented and experienced individual who benefited from being in the right place to have the opportunity to do what he'd set his mind to doing.
I was young once with my whole life in front of me and the benefit of more or less not knowing better. During that time I had two dreams. One was to be an actor. The other was to be President of The United States. I wanted to be each of them because then I'd get to do something I was interested in all of the time. I'd be recognized being that person and that would come to define me to the world. All I wanted was the recognition and to know that people liked me. As I got older, those dreams began to melt and to become more reasonable. By the time I was 21, I wanted to be a film director or just an important local politician. There are way more people who can do those jobs. Then my dreams continued their slide. By the time I was 26, I wanted to be a writer or just someone who was a political insider. Even if I couldn't head the process, I could still be a part of it. Five years, a breakup and an economic crash later, I don't even believe in those dreams anymore. I've found my level and it is what has always been: interested observer. Nothing has changed except for the future as I imagined it. It never arrived.
What I've learned as I've gotten older is your dreams change. What you want out of life becomes less of a destination than a place, a continuous feeling over a one-time accomplishment. It's less about becoming something different and more about fully becoming yourself. Your personal identity is developed so you're less worried about something outside of yourself defining you. In fact, I'm more worried about something negatively defining me than I try to latch onto something positive. If I were more religious that might be different. As it is, I aim to represent the inner me to as many people as possible who want to know it.
Now, as I'm older and less and less naive, I have different dreams. They're things I started a long time ago and thought I would come back to if and when I ever got a chance. They were what I would do once I'd achieved my dreams and then could do whatever I wanted. The irony is I wanted the freedom which would come with success and have been provided that same freedom by abject failure. It's very much the same as the monetary freedom I enjoy because I didn't push myself academically and thus didn't incur astronomical amounts of debt by going to graduate school. P = q but not p can = q too.
My dream now is to have a room. It will have to be a place where I can complete my project and be able to leave it. One of the constants in my life since I was 16 is not living in the same place for very long. Part of that is my choice and it is in response to the part of it which is not. I'd like to be able to not need to tear it down. This room will be mine and it will reflect the inner me. To that extent I've been saving pictures and articles from magazines since I was 19 years old. I keep them in a tan plastic filebox which I dutifully slug from old apartment to new apartment waiting for the day they can all come out to stay. In it are basketball and baseball players I thought were cool, bands which I wanted to memorialize and even a few pictures I tore out because it made sense. They are just things I was interested in or thought looked cool. I'd like to have a place where I can put these mementos on the wall and just sit amongst them. I enjoy high-backed chairs and I will have one in my room. Whenever I'm feeling not like myself or want to reminisce that room will be my refuge. I won't keep snacks or work or even anything I'd use on a regular basis in there. And when I'm not using it, I will keep the door closed.
You can visit it if you'd like. But please be respectful of your surroundings. Take note this is what my dream became. My dream is to have a place which reminds me of the time when I still held onto my dreams. Others may lament the lose of their dreams or continue holding onto them under longer and longer odds. My dreams fulfilled their destiny to become nothing and I feel better for recognizing it. If they say it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all, then I say the same is true of dreaming. And like love, I will not dream like I did as a young man. The loss of my dreams will not embitter me or cause me to close my heart to them. It will be a mature dream I seek, a better and more realistic dream for me to follow. One which is based on me who I am instead of the me I'd once hoped I'd become.
Then life catches up with you. Things aren't as easy as they seem and that person who achieved the dream you're aspiring to... well, they're the one who did it. There were other people who also wanted to do the same thing, who dreamed the dream just like them, who never got there. You don't hear their stories because there's no way you could document them all. They are swept away by the rushing horde who follows the one person who did achieve their dream. When Eminem says "You can do anything you set your mind, man," at the end of Lose Yourself, he's speaking from his own experience. He just omits that he was a remarkably talented and experienced individual who benefited from being in the right place to have the opportunity to do what he'd set his mind to doing.
I was young once with my whole life in front of me and the benefit of more or less not knowing better. During that time I had two dreams. One was to be an actor. The other was to be President of The United States. I wanted to be each of them because then I'd get to do something I was interested in all of the time. I'd be recognized being that person and that would come to define me to the world. All I wanted was the recognition and to know that people liked me. As I got older, those dreams began to melt and to become more reasonable. By the time I was 21, I wanted to be a film director or just an important local politician. There are way more people who can do those jobs. Then my dreams continued their slide. By the time I was 26, I wanted to be a writer or just someone who was a political insider. Even if I couldn't head the process, I could still be a part of it. Five years, a breakup and an economic crash later, I don't even believe in those dreams anymore. I've found my level and it is what has always been: interested observer. Nothing has changed except for the future as I imagined it. It never arrived.
What I've learned as I've gotten older is your dreams change. What you want out of life becomes less of a destination than a place, a continuous feeling over a one-time accomplishment. It's less about becoming something different and more about fully becoming yourself. Your personal identity is developed so you're less worried about something outside of yourself defining you. In fact, I'm more worried about something negatively defining me than I try to latch onto something positive. If I were more religious that might be different. As it is, I aim to represent the inner me to as many people as possible who want to know it.
Now, as I'm older and less and less naive, I have different dreams. They're things I started a long time ago and thought I would come back to if and when I ever got a chance. They were what I would do once I'd achieved my dreams and then could do whatever I wanted. The irony is I wanted the freedom which would come with success and have been provided that same freedom by abject failure. It's very much the same as the monetary freedom I enjoy because I didn't push myself academically and thus didn't incur astronomical amounts of debt by going to graduate school. P = q but not p can = q too.
My dream now is to have a room. It will have to be a place where I can complete my project and be able to leave it. One of the constants in my life since I was 16 is not living in the same place for very long. Part of that is my choice and it is in response to the part of it which is not. I'd like to be able to not need to tear it down. This room will be mine and it will reflect the inner me. To that extent I've been saving pictures and articles from magazines since I was 19 years old. I keep them in a tan plastic filebox which I dutifully slug from old apartment to new apartment waiting for the day they can all come out to stay. In it are basketball and baseball players I thought were cool, bands which I wanted to memorialize and even a few pictures I tore out because it made sense. They are just things I was interested in or thought looked cool. I'd like to have a place where I can put these mementos on the wall and just sit amongst them. I enjoy high-backed chairs and I will have one in my room. Whenever I'm feeling not like myself or want to reminisce that room will be my refuge. I won't keep snacks or work or even anything I'd use on a regular basis in there. And when I'm not using it, I will keep the door closed.
You can visit it if you'd like. But please be respectful of your surroundings. Take note this is what my dream became. My dream is to have a place which reminds me of the time when I still held onto my dreams. Others may lament the lose of their dreams or continue holding onto them under longer and longer odds. My dreams fulfilled their destiny to become nothing and I feel better for recognizing it. If they say it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all, then I say the same is true of dreaming. And like love, I will not dream like I did as a young man. The loss of my dreams will not embitter me or cause me to close my heart to them. It will be a mature dream I seek, a better and more realistic dream for me to follow. One which is based on me who I am instead of the me I'd once hoped I'd become.
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
And Evidence Suggests I'm The Man For The Job
I've stayed out of the Wisconsin union discussion for the same reason I never voted when I lived in Green Bay (or Chicago): It's their state and not mine. But a lot of my friends have been posting this as a status update lately:
"Only 5 states do not have collective bargaining for educators (i.e. “teachers unions”) and have deemed it illegal. Those states and their ranking on ACT/SAT scores are as follows:
South Carolina - 50th
North Carolina - 49th
Georgia - 48th
Texas - 47th
Virginia - 44th
Wisconsin ranked 2nd in 2010 in combined ACT/SAT.
(http://law2.umkc.edu/faculty/projects/ftrials/states/USCHARTsat.html)"
Which is I was tickled to find these two quotes in a book I'm reading about political doublespeak, "Aristotle and an Aardvark: Understanding Political Doublespeak Through Philosophy and Jokes", and thought I would share them for your personal enjoyment.
" 'The 10 states with the lowest per pupil spending including 4- North Dakota, South Dakota, Tennessee & Utah - in the top 10 states with the highest SAT scores. Only 1- Wisconsin -was among the 10 states with the highest SAT scores. New Jersey has the highest per pupil, an astonishing $10,561, which teachers' unions elsewhere try to use as a negotiating benchmark. New Jersey's rank regarding SAT scores? 39th. ...'
George Will, Washington Post, September 12th, 1993"
"In the Journal of Statistics Education, Deborah Lynn Guber points out that a crucial factor Mr. Will ignores in his analysis is participation rates: the percentage of students in each state who actually take the SAT. It turns out that in North Dakota, state colleges require the ACT rather than the SAT, so only 5% of North Dakota students take the SAT. It is fair to say that among that 5% are a large number of students who want to go to prestigious out-of-state schools (that do require the SAT) and who, because of their proven academic abilities, think they have a shot at it. In New Jersey, by comparison, 79 percent of students take the SAT- certainly a more representative cross-section of the entire population of high school graduates. So the SAT scores of the brightest ND students are being compared to the SAT scores of more typical NJ students."
I think the implication is pretty clear. We can definitely get non-union labor to do George Will's job.
"Only 5 states do not have collective bargaining for educators (i.e. “teachers unions”) and have deemed it illegal. Those states and their ranking on ACT/SAT scores are as follows:
South Carolina - 50th
North Carolina - 49th
Georgia - 48th
Texas - 47th
Virginia - 44th
Wisconsin ranked 2nd in 2010 in combined ACT/SAT.
(http://law2.umkc.edu/faculty/projects/ftrials/states/USCHARTsat.html)"
Which is I was tickled to find these two quotes in a book I'm reading about political doublespeak, "Aristotle and an Aardvark: Understanding Political Doublespeak Through Philosophy and Jokes", and thought I would share them for your personal enjoyment.
" 'The 10 states with the lowest per pupil spending including 4- North Dakota, South Dakota, Tennessee & Utah - in the top 10 states with the highest SAT scores. Only 1- Wisconsin -was among the 10 states with the highest SAT scores. New Jersey has the highest per pupil, an astonishing $10,561, which teachers' unions elsewhere try to use as a negotiating benchmark. New Jersey's rank regarding SAT scores? 39th. ...'
George Will, Washington Post, September 12th, 1993"
"In the Journal of Statistics Education, Deborah Lynn Guber points out that a crucial factor Mr. Will ignores in his analysis is participation rates: the percentage of students in each state who actually take the SAT. It turns out that in North Dakota, state colleges require the ACT rather than the SAT, so only 5% of North Dakota students take the SAT. It is fair to say that among that 5% are a large number of students who want to go to prestigious out-of-state schools (that do require the SAT) and who, because of their proven academic abilities, think they have a shot at it. In New Jersey, by comparison, 79 percent of students take the SAT- certainly a more representative cross-section of the entire population of high school graduates. So the SAT scores of the brightest ND students are being compared to the SAT scores of more typical NJ students."
I think the implication is pretty clear. We can definitely get non-union labor to do George Will's job.
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Why Dan and Smallz Should Like Brandon Jennings
1.) He's From Compton!
On a list of Compton natives from NWA to Coolio, he's slightly cooler than Cedric Ceballos and just behind Krist Novoselic. If he had been in the dunk contest this year, he could've found himself in the company of Mort Sahl.
2.) He's The Greatest Scorer In Oak Hill Academy History.
Not Carmelo Anthony, not Kevin Durant, not Jerry Stackhouse, not Michael Beasley, not Rod Strickland.
Brandon Jennings
P.S. He also won the Naismith Award for Best H.S. Boys Basketball Player in 2008.
3.) He Wore A High-Top Fade To The All-American Game.
Brandon grew his hair out thru his senior year knowing he was going to play in the All-American game and wanted to rock the Gumby look. Let me rephrase. Knowing that there was something important down the line, he prepared and focused on it for months.
4.) And Then He Brought It Back!
If you miss the old Gilbert Arenas, I'd like to introduce you to the new Gilbert Arenas. Brandon was even going to Arizona a la Gilbert before he changed to the Europe plans.
5.) Basketball, more than any other American sport, is a game.
Baseball lends itself to statistics because its parameters are so easily defined. Football is all about team planning and preparation. Hockey is close but bogs itself in last line changes and other unspoken rules. Basketball is harder to pin down. It's parameters are so simple (beat your man) and ambiguous (how DO you beat him?).
You can show me that Brandon does X-Y-Z and that means A-B-C. I have no problem believing that. I'm just hesitant to believe there is a secret formula to basketball in the same way that getting guys on base and scoring them while preserving outs seems to be the winning formula in baseball. There are too many factors which come into the mechanics of basketball to say there's one or two things you can focus on.
What I like to see is the end result of a player beating his man with style. When Jennings goes around his back before he throws an alley-oop to John Wall, I'm titillated. When he leaves a drop pass for Andrew Bogut between his legs, I'm excited. When he crosses Stephen Curry to the ground, my heart makes a small leap. Why do all of our warriors have to be automatons? Isn't the thing that's great about basketball is when it approaches Art?
All of this is subjectivity, yes. But, for me, subjectivity is not a dirty word. When I watch basketball I want it to be entertaining and Brandon Jennings is one of the most consistently entertaining players in the NBA.
On a list of Compton natives from NWA to Coolio, he's slightly cooler than Cedric Ceballos and just behind Krist Novoselic. If he had been in the dunk contest this year, he could've found himself in the company of Mort Sahl.
2.) He's The Greatest Scorer In Oak Hill Academy History.
Not Carmelo Anthony, not Kevin Durant, not Jerry Stackhouse, not Michael Beasley, not Rod Strickland.
Brandon Jennings
P.S. He also won the Naismith Award for Best H.S. Boys Basketball Player in 2008.
3.) He Wore A High-Top Fade To The All-American Game.
Brandon grew his hair out thru his senior year knowing he was going to play in the All-American game and wanted to rock the Gumby look. Let me rephrase. Knowing that there was something important down the line, he prepared and focused on it for months.
4.) And Then He Brought It Back!
If you miss the old Gilbert Arenas, I'd like to introduce you to the new Gilbert Arenas. Brandon was even going to Arizona a la Gilbert before he changed to the Europe plans.
5.) Basketball, more than any other American sport, is a game.
Baseball lends itself to statistics because its parameters are so easily defined. Football is all about team planning and preparation. Hockey is close but bogs itself in last line changes and other unspoken rules. Basketball is harder to pin down. It's parameters are so simple (beat your man) and ambiguous (how DO you beat him?).
You can show me that Brandon does X-Y-Z and that means A-B-C. I have no problem believing that. I'm just hesitant to believe there is a secret formula to basketball in the same way that getting guys on base and scoring them while preserving outs seems to be the winning formula in baseball. There are too many factors which come into the mechanics of basketball to say there's one or two things you can focus on.
What I like to see is the end result of a player beating his man with style. When Jennings goes around his back before he throws an alley-oop to John Wall, I'm titillated. When he leaves a drop pass for Andrew Bogut between his legs, I'm excited. When he crosses Stephen Curry to the ground, my heart makes a small leap. Why do all of our warriors have to be automatons? Isn't the thing that's great about basketball is when it approaches Art?
All of this is subjectivity, yes. But, for me, subjectivity is not a dirty word. When I watch basketball I want it to be entertaining and Brandon Jennings is one of the most consistently entertaining players in the NBA.
Saturday, January 15, 2011
One White Album (Why?)
I typed my original White Album post on Thursday in a bit of a rush. I wanted to get the idea out there and get reactions to it before coming back to my reasoning later.
Mostly people missed the really weird songs from The White Album which is what I was going for actually. For example, I think Dear Prudence is a meandering piece of fluff with 6 words which doesn't even crack the top 300 Beatles songs. The White Album is better by cutting all of the Prudences, Rocky Raccoons and even Ob-La-Di Ob-La-Das.
My intent was to make a good, straight-forward 1968 rock album. This was the most popular band in the world slowly tearing itself apart from the inside. In my mind this is The Beatles deciding to rededicate themselves and go back to what made them great; making better music than anyone else.
Side A - I felt it was necessary to throw in sides for historical accuracy. If The Beatles were sequencing this album in 1968, there would've been breaks to be exploited.
Glass Onion - The actual White Album begins with Back In the USSR or more accurately with the sound of a plane landing in a great big theatrical entrance. I wanted to go against that. It's two beats and begin with the song.
Additionally, Glass Onion references The Beatles' history as a band. My scenario has them rededicating themselves to being The Best Band In The World and acknowledging their past is a part of that. Putting that up front is even bolder.
Yer Blues - I included this one because it's a bluesy rock song. Also, John Lennon went from "Help! I need somebody!" to "Yes, I'm lonely, wanna die." in three years. Following Glass Onion, it's pretty stark how The Beatles feel about themselves.
While My Guitar Gently Weeps - I think this is the best song on The White Album and possibly the best song in their oeuvre. The real White Album didn't have a single but I'd make this the lead single from the album and as such I put it into the third spot on Side A where most lead singles go.
I'm So Tired - This is one of the under-appreciated songs on The White Album. I think of it as an echo of I'm Only Sleeping from Revolver.
Cry Baby Cry - I didn't want to make The Beatles into joyless assholes (despite the evidence) and left this song on to reflect their playful and less-serious side. Also the little "Can you take me back where I be from?" code leads really well into Julia.
Julia - This is the second prettiest song on the album and John's homage to his mother. A perfect song to take the listener between sides.
Side B - After John covers the vocal duties on all but one of the songs on Side A, he only sings lead once on the flip.
Blackbird - Though he will be forever most remembered for Yesterday, Paul really should be remembered for this song. It's buried on The White Album and I rectify that by moving it to the beginning of Side B. Imagine setting the needle in the groove and the first thing that comes thru the speakers is this song. It would really be perfect.
Revolution 1 - Whereas the version on the B Side of Hey Jude is a fuzzed-out rock song, the horns and slower tempo swing here. I also like putting it one song before...
Back In the USSR - The album hits the fast forward and peaks loudly between this song and the next.
Helter Skelter - Ok, so not a great song on its own and the temptation might be to delete this song because of its association with Charles Manson. I leave it because it represents how much of the mythology of The Beatles is stuff that was out of their control.
Savoy Truffle - George gets one song on Side A and one on Side B. I think this is one of his songs that had-he-not-been-in-The-Beatles is an indicator what his music would've sounded like in his own band.
I Will - Again, while The White Album makes a big theatrical production of its departure with Good Night (sorry Ringo but no singing for you here), I aimed to go against that and have the album make a sweet and subtle exit.
Mostly people missed the really weird songs from The White Album which is what I was going for actually. For example, I think Dear Prudence is a meandering piece of fluff with 6 words which doesn't even crack the top 300 Beatles songs. The White Album is better by cutting all of the Prudences, Rocky Raccoons and even Ob-La-Di Ob-La-Das.
My intent was to make a good, straight-forward 1968 rock album. This was the most popular band in the world slowly tearing itself apart from the inside. In my mind this is The Beatles deciding to rededicate themselves and go back to what made them great; making better music than anyone else.
Side A - I felt it was necessary to throw in sides for historical accuracy. If The Beatles were sequencing this album in 1968, there would've been breaks to be exploited.
Glass Onion - The actual White Album begins with Back In the USSR or more accurately with the sound of a plane landing in a great big theatrical entrance. I wanted to go against that. It's two beats and begin with the song.
Additionally, Glass Onion references The Beatles' history as a band. My scenario has them rededicating themselves to being The Best Band In The World and acknowledging their past is a part of that. Putting that up front is even bolder.
Yer Blues - I included this one because it's a bluesy rock song. Also, John Lennon went from "Help! I need somebody!" to "Yes, I'm lonely, wanna die." in three years. Following Glass Onion, it's pretty stark how The Beatles feel about themselves.
While My Guitar Gently Weeps - I think this is the best song on The White Album and possibly the best song in their oeuvre. The real White Album didn't have a single but I'd make this the lead single from the album and as such I put it into the third spot on Side A where most lead singles go.
I'm So Tired - This is one of the under-appreciated songs on The White Album. I think of it as an echo of I'm Only Sleeping from Revolver.
Cry Baby Cry - I didn't want to make The Beatles into joyless assholes (despite the evidence) and left this song on to reflect their playful and less-serious side. Also the little "Can you take me back where I be from?" code leads really well into Julia.
Julia - This is the second prettiest song on the album and John's homage to his mother. A perfect song to take the listener between sides.
Side B - After John covers the vocal duties on all but one of the songs on Side A, he only sings lead once on the flip.
Blackbird - Though he will be forever most remembered for Yesterday, Paul really should be remembered for this song. It's buried on The White Album and I rectify that by moving it to the beginning of Side B. Imagine setting the needle in the groove and the first thing that comes thru the speakers is this song. It would really be perfect.
Revolution 1 - Whereas the version on the B Side of Hey Jude is a fuzzed-out rock song, the horns and slower tempo swing here. I also like putting it one song before...
Back In the USSR - The album hits the fast forward and peaks loudly between this song and the next.
Helter Skelter - Ok, so not a great song on its own and the temptation might be to delete this song because of its association with Charles Manson. I leave it because it represents how much of the mythology of The Beatles is stuff that was out of their control.
Savoy Truffle - George gets one song on Side A and one on Side B. I think this is one of his songs that had-he-not-been-in-The-Beatles is an indicator what his music would've sounded like in his own band.
I Will - Again, while The White Album makes a big theatrical production of its departure with Good Night (sorry Ringo but no singing for you here), I aimed to go against that and have the album make a sweet and subtle exit.
Thursday, January 13, 2011
One White Album
My friend Jeff asked me how I would pare and re-order The White Album if I wanted to make it into just one album. In fact, here's what he wrote...
"Just thought this would be fun. If you were the Beatles, and you had to whittle The White Album down to one LP because George Martin finds it too bloated, what tracks (maximum of 15) would you keep and what order would you put them in?"
Jeff, I can do it in 12 songs.
Side A
Glass Onion (Lennon/McCartney)
Yer Blues (Lennon/McCartney)
While My Guitar Gently Weeps (Harrison)
I'm So Tired (Lennon/McCartney)
Cry Baby Cry (Lennon/McCartney)
Julia (Lennon/McCartney)
Side B
Blackbird (Lennon/McCartney)
Revolution 1 (Lennon/McCartney)
Back In the USSR (Lennon/McCartney)
Helter Skelter (Lennon/McCartney)
Savoy Truffle (Harrison)
I Will (Lennon/McCartney)
"Just thought this would be fun. If you were the Beatles, and you had to whittle The White Album down to one LP because George Martin finds it too bloated, what tracks (maximum of 15) would you keep and what order would you put them in?"
Jeff, I can do it in 12 songs.
Side A
Glass Onion (Lennon/McCartney)
Yer Blues (Lennon/McCartney)
While My Guitar Gently Weeps (Harrison)
I'm So Tired (Lennon/McCartney)
Cry Baby Cry (Lennon/McCartney)
Julia (Lennon/McCartney)
Side B
Blackbird (Lennon/McCartney)
Revolution 1 (Lennon/McCartney)
Back In the USSR (Lennon/McCartney)
Helter Skelter (Lennon/McCartney)
Savoy Truffle (Harrison)
I Will (Lennon/McCartney)
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Set For Random and Enjoy
I recently had to wipe the hard-drive on my laptop because I'd let my virus protection lapse. (In my defense it was a year and half before anything went wrong.) Not only did it provide me an opportunity to upgrade to Windows 7 but also to reload all my music onto my computer. Which is to say I only put stuff back onto it which I really wanted. I feel very satisfied with the results. Here's the list which would be a perfect cross-section of music I like.
Adriano Celentano - Prisencolinsinainciusol
The Arcade Fire - The Suburbs
Aziz Ansari - Intimate Moments for A Sensual Evening
Blackroc - s/t
Bob Dylen - Greatest Hits Vol. 1&2
Broken Social Scene - Something For All of Us & Spirit If...
Cee-Lo Green - Noone's Going To Love You
Chiddy Bang - Hey London & The Opposite of Adults
Doomtree - False Hopes
Doctor Dog - Shame, Shame
The Flaming Lips - Borderline
Gorillaz - Some Kind of Nature
Green Day - 21st Century Breakdown
GZA - Pro Tools
Jonsi - Time to Pretend
Kanye West - My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy
Kings of Leon - Sex On Fire
Kraftwerk - I, II, Autobahn & Ralf and Florian
La Roux - s/t
Lil Wayne - Carter III
MGMT - Congratulations
Minutemen - Double Nickels on The Dime
Mos Def - The Ecstatic
Pavement - Terror Twilight
Rick Ross - Ashes to Ashes
Sonic Youth - Antenna
Stephen Malkmus & The Jicks - Pig Lib & Real Emotional Trash
Sufjan Stevens - The Age of Adz
The Talking Heads - More Songs About Buildings and Food
The Tallest Man On Earth - The Wild Hunt
Titus Andronicus - The Monitor
The White Stripes - Under Great White Northern Lights
That's a set of music you can put on shuffle and pretty much count that one song will flow from another to an other.
Adriano Celentano - Prisencolinsinainciusol
The Arcade Fire - The Suburbs
Aziz Ansari - Intimate Moments for A Sensual Evening
Blackroc - s/t
Bob Dylen - Greatest Hits Vol. 1&2
Broken Social Scene - Something For All of Us & Spirit If...
Cee-Lo Green - Noone's Going To Love You
Chiddy Bang - Hey London & The Opposite of Adults
Doomtree - False Hopes
Doctor Dog - Shame, Shame
The Flaming Lips - Borderline
Gorillaz - Some Kind of Nature
Green Day - 21st Century Breakdown
GZA - Pro Tools
Jonsi - Time to Pretend
Kanye West - My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy
Kings of Leon - Sex On Fire
Kraftwerk - I, II, Autobahn & Ralf and Florian
La Roux - s/t
Lil Wayne - Carter III
MGMT - Congratulations
Minutemen - Double Nickels on The Dime
Mos Def - The Ecstatic
Pavement - Terror Twilight
Rick Ross - Ashes to Ashes
Sonic Youth - Antenna
Stephen Malkmus & The Jicks - Pig Lib & Real Emotional Trash
Sufjan Stevens - The Age of Adz
The Talking Heads - More Songs About Buildings and Food
The Tallest Man On Earth - The Wild Hunt
Titus Andronicus - The Monitor
The White Stripes - Under Great White Northern Lights
That's a set of music you can put on shuffle and pretty much count that one song will flow from another to an other.
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